Saturday, August 22, 2015

and so it goes


I guess that those of you who have followed Mary's medical ordeal would like a progress report. I apologize for not being more communicative lately, but it just seems that finding the time to do so hasn't been a priority for me. Mary has been home now for three weeks and I can honestly say that she is .......worse now than she was the day I brought home. She can't eat because the mere suggestion of food makes her nauseated. And if she does try eating, it will be in such small amounts that it does her no good. Her doctor says she isn't eating enough to sustain life and the healing process is slower because she isn't getting any nutrients to help her get stronger. His recommendation is that she gets a feeding tube installed to get her the nutrients she needs that she isn't getting by eating the way she has been eating.
The constant enduring pain she has had to put up with has drained her of all strength. The longest walk she has taken is the distance from the bed to the couch. For me, seeing her suffer like this without being able to do anything about it, is emasculating. Worst of all is that she seems to have lost her sense of humor.
So back to the hospital we go. There they installed a feeding tube in her nose and down her throat, bypassing her stomach and dumping the food directly into her intestines. The reason for bypassing the stomach is that that is where the nausea is coming from as the food is rejected.
Now I am a medical tech as well as a nurse and a housekeeper and a handyman and a caregiver and last but not least, still a lover. I now know how to set up and operate a tube pump just like a real technician. Add that to my newfound skills acquired during my time in all those roles. I don't mind flushing those tubes or helping her get dressed. We have a visiting nurse coming twice a week to check her vital signs, but I could do that as well. Three times each week a CNA comes by to bathe her, but I could definitely do that better and promise her it would be more fun.
The only downer we have (besides all the pain and the worry and the stress and the fear) is that this is certainly not the way we expected to spend the summer. We have ignored all our friends out there because we are so wrapped up with our situation that we haven't taken the time to enjoy their company. No one can possibly know just how sick Mary has been. She could have died. We are so focused on dodging that bullet that the people we call friends have been relegated to bystanders. That rude ignoring on our part is inexcusable, but the fact that we only select the finest, most honorable, intelligent, and upstanding people as friends means that eventually we will be forgiven and welcomed back into the fold. Please be patient with us. We will be back once we get rid of this burden that's been keeping us down. 

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